Bitter Sweet

So this week is the last week of the semester and it is pretty bitter sweet. This semester started off really well, but it ended pretty terribly. I've never done this bad in school and I'm struggling to pass a class! That has definitely never happened! I'm really bitter about how I did this semester. I really did not have my priorities straight and I honestly contemplated dropping out. I was doing so well at my job and I really got ahead of myself. The sweet part is that now I realize that school is important and I have every intention of getting priorities together. I now see that school is not a party or meant to be extremely fun, but when you make the best of it, it can be really enjoyable. I'm actually really excited for next semester to start, and to get all my classes. I really want to do all my homework and do the best that I can. I really am sick of selling myself short and not living up to my full potential. On a  more serious note, I have my child development final tomorrow. I really messed up in that class this semester. I really did not like the teaching style of the professor and honestly this professor would contradict the book and teach the opposite of what was on the test, so i stopped going to class all together. I lost  a lot of participation points.  Honestly, I know people say don't skip class because it's a waste of money and your paying to be there, but being in that class made me either fall asleep or made me want to yell because I was so frustrated that the professor taught the opposite of the book. However, this class was a huge turning point for me, and I realized that I don't want my major to be child development. I changed my major to Spanish and I went and met with a counselor and found out I'm ahead of schedule on my classes for this major! So even though this semester had its downs, I'm really excited that I learned from it and can close this chapter of my life and move on to the next.

Day 3

Today was day 3 of my mini vacation, and I remembered a word that was made when the recession hit "staycation." Magazines and other advertisers were telling people save money be on vacation, but stay close to home, and that's exactly what i did on my vacation. Today was pretty uneventful, but when your on vacation isn't that exactly what you a need. A day not full of errands and a schedule, but that relaxing feeling that you can honestly do whatever you want. I slept in until around 10 and started my day off right with a trip to the gym. I've really been so excited because on almost all of my gym trips i run/walk at least four miles. I never was able to work out that much prior to my surgery over Christmas break. I got my tonsils out and its helped a great deal. I've always played sports and gone to the gym, but i always had difficulties breathing and with my endurance. i always just thought I wasn't very athletic, but during my senior year of swim I literally had times where i could not breath. One meet during bolsa i was swimming the 200 individual medley and during the first 50 yards I honestly was gasping for air. i finished the race luckily, but as i finished i started to have a panic attack because i couldn't catch my breath. My best friend at the time Kayla had to basically lift me out of the pool. I went to the doctor and it turns out my tonsils were so swollen, no wonder I couldn't breath. i was out of swim for about a month until i got better, but senior year was definitely not my best season of swim.  Then it was just a time issue of when i was going to get my tonsils out, and winter break was the best time because I wouldn't miss school. But back to my vacation, after the gym I came home and had lunch and then i studied for finals. I don't know what it is about studying but it gives me such a headache! Then I went to costco and then I came home and watched some movies and I definitely need to get some more studying in.

Day 2

Last night i went on a little sushi date with my best friend Christy. Then we went to the hookah bar called Twilight. They played the best arrangement of music ever! i want the dj to spin at the club we always go dancing at because it would be so much more fun. On day 2 of my mini vacation, i started my day off by going to the dentist, then i stayed at home and had the most relaxing day i have had in such a long time. I watched 27 Dresses. that movie is so cute. When my dad got home from work we went on a little shopping spree and i got to buy new sheets. they are a deep burgundy; they are so pretty. After that we came home and watched Tron. it was alright. i could tell that most people were raving about it because of the effects and everything, but the story line didnt keep me awake for long. After that i watched The Backup Plan with Jennifer Lopez. i remember the first time i watched that movie, i was not expecting it to be a winner, but it turned out to be really funny. Now im relaxing having a Bring it On marathon which is on mtv and giving myself a facial. Taking a little time off work was probably exactly what i needed.

This weekend

this weekend was supposed to be a mini vacation for me. i took the whole weekend off work and i was supposed to go to Arizona with my brother to watch his friend from ASU graduate. Of course things felt too good to be true, and they were. My brother calls me while im in my last class yesterday and tells me that he is leaving with out me and not only that he wants to take my car! i was devastated. not only was i really looking forward to getting away this weekend, no matter where i was really going, he wanted to take my car! it just really made me realize that i do so much for him and he really honestly does not care about me whatsoever. well obviously i was really upset, i mean what am i supposed to do now this whole weekend. I eventually calmed down and realized it was probably for the best, now i can stay home and study for finals. its just really disappointing to know that the circumstances this all happened was because my brother is so selfish and doesnt care about me. Anyways, today is day one of my mini vacation off work and after i type this blog, i will be hitting the gym! After the gym i want to tan out by the pool and then later hang out with my friend julia. we really need to catch up and it has been way too long since she and i had a movie night!

Last night i watched something borrowed with my best friend christy. it was a lot different than what i expected, but it was still a cute movie. we went to the amc at the block at around eight and we bought out tickets. then we filled out this survey at the movie theatre for three dollars each. Free money why not! then we went and sat in the movie. we had already made the decision to not buy snacks, because we were going to eat afterward. as we were watching the previews we smelled a lovely aroma of popcorn and butter and we had to get up and go buy some. i still will never understand how movie theatres get away with selling their food for so much money, but people buy it anyways so i guess thats why. Anyway we walked back to our seats and the movie started. At first i thought this movie was going to be a hilarious romantic comedy, however, i was clearly mistaken. Dont get me wrong the movie had some hilarious parts. It just was nothing like i thought it was going to be. The character Rachel was the studious friend out of the two best friends and she graduated from law school and everything. The other best friend Darcy was the party animal "fun" friend. I really related to this movie because Rachel was always struggling next to Darcy saying that everything was a competition and Darcy always won. However, you go to find out that Rachel was just giving everything to her, Darcy was never actually winning. This made me relate back to my relationship with my cousin because out of the two of us she's the prettier, skinnier one. the boys always flock to her, but after watching this movie i realized its true, one does give up the fight for what they want to the person who you think deserves it. But maybe once in a while people like Rachel in the movie or even me deserve to win a little.

Finals are coming up and I couldn’t be any more stressed out. I don’t know what it was about this semester if it was because I was working more or because I finally found friends in college, but I totally slacked off. Im so stressed out I just don’t know where to go from here. My grades are pretty much set anything I do now will help, but not change how much I slacked off in the beginning of the semester. I really am focused on doing better next semester, especially since this semester was such an eye opener on how I need to manage my time and designate time for work, friends, and school. I really think that this semester my real big issue was time management. I’m glad to say that I did not partake in too much procrastination this semester, but everything I forgot to do cancels out everything I did do on time. I also went on huge shopping sprees and spent way too much money this semester. I’m glad to say that I have learned from my mistakes and I never want to feel this amount of stress again. Next semester is going to be completely different. Time management is my new thing to work on and also self control. Self control was my new year’s resolution and I started out doing really well and then slacked off again. I’m turning everything around; now I just need to get through the next three weeks without blowing a gasket L

ode to the moon

oh beautiful moon coming out as the sun sets to sleep, to help us dream of handsome boys on white horses and to help us count sheep, to watch over us as we party all night, you sure are a trooper cuz there might be a fight and until tomorrow when i see you again sleep tight my dear friend cuz tomorrow we will party all night!

yesterday i was so bored that i actually wrote this poem ode to the moon. i dont really know what came over me to write this except for the fact that i was really bored and i couldnt sleep. i just couldnt help but think that if the moon was a person it would either be really bored or really amused watching all the crazy things people do. then i thought i must be really crazy for thinking what the moon would be thinking if it was a person. i also was really frustrated because my best friend has been really shady lately. I just cant help but think random things when its late at night and i cant sleep. im always really tired, but then when i turn off the light and lay down i cant seem to sleep. that always happens to me unfortunately.